The Happy Arab News Service

Thursday, November 9, 2006

Rio Comes to Gaza

An initial investigation by the IDF determined that 7 artillery shells were indeed fired into the Beit Hanun neighborhood due to malfunction in target acquisition system. 18 people died, 10 of them children.

The scale of the reaction that followed is nothing surprising given a huge number of people in the region who suffer from a severe lack of sufficient emotional stimulation. The Palestinians in Gaza, in the best of their tradition, organized a huge carnival of screaming women and unshaven militants who fired non-stop into air. Frankly I gave up on Rio carnivals long time ago, as the Brazilians in my view have been beaten by the Palis in everything related to carnivals. I well remember one day when Hamas was parading its weapons across Gaza city and in a huge explosion more than one hundred people were killed and wounded. I doubt if Rio has ever had fireworks on this scale. 3|run0 should know better.

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In Tel Aviv Lirun was writing today:

so sad right now..
nothing can describe the sadness i feel right now over those who have suffered at our hands in beit hanoun.. the images of those RED streets will haunt me forever..

the insecurity of my neighbors is my own insecurity..


Unfortunately Lirun has found little understanding with Mustafa from the BeirutSpring:

One can hardly dismiss the timing. On the eve of the American elections, where the eyes of the world are turning elsewhere, the Israelis commit yet another senseless atrocity.

I have no doubt whatsoever that the killing of women and children was intentional. spare us your "apologies", nobody is buying it. You make me sick!


Mustafa in general has a great touch for conspiracy theories. During the last war he figured out that it was all about water resources with the IDF desperately trying to reach Litani river. Now with the IDF having been repelled, our defense forces apparently found an indirect way to Litani. With the eyes of the world fixed on American elections, the IDF resorted to what it knows to do best - killing babies. Thank you, Mustafa, for the great insights you are sharing with us.

I was always wondering actually - howcome a nation, which lost 100,000 people out of 3.5 millions to a vicious civil war, happens to possess such an extraordinary sensitivity to civilian casualties ?!?! In particular when they happen hundreds of miles away in another country !!!

Another Lebanese is writing on her blog:

All day, thinking about that French saying : “ deux poids, deux mesures”. Two weights, two units.

Reading the news, talking to colleagues, listening to others’ conversations.

Borat said it on Saturday Night Live… “Live from New York…home of the Jew”.

Jew York? More like Jew World these days.

I am not defending Saddam Hussein or his actions. Massacres have happened under his regime. There is a self-righteousness though that is, the least to say, annoying. “He got what he deserved… this ruling is a good thing..”

What about the Sharon-sponsored massacres of Sabra and Shatila? For how long are we going to ignore that wound that hasn’t started healing yet?

What about this last war that we barely survived! “In love as in war, all is fair”. Except that in everything, “deux poids, deux mesures”.


Since long ago I have been suspecting that Arabs don't have the words "hypocrisy" and "double standards" in their language. Otherwise why they struggle so much with these concepts and resort to French to express themselves on these issues? The Lebanese had been successfully murdering Palestinians long before the IDF invaded the country and already in the Karantina massacre about 1000 were killed. Probably the most fascinating episode of this stage of the Lebanese civil war were roadblocks erected across Beirut by the Christians from LF who politely asked all passers-by to say "tomato". Those who struggled to hide their Palestinian accent had their throats immediately slit. These people were in no mood to waste their bullets on Palestinians.

Sponsored or not by Sharon, Sabra and Shatila massacres were carried out by the same Lebanese. No Israeli soldier was inside the camps at that time. Surprisingly Hobeika, who lead the massacres, was never tried as a war criminal. Well, he just didn't have time for this shit, serving as a minister in the post war Lebanese government.

But the saga of the camps continued long after Israel withdrew from there as they were later invaded by the coalition of the Shiite Amal and the Druz from PSP. Both Sabra and Shatila were destroyed and thousands of Palis died. During the war of the camps Sabra and Shatila were repeatedly blockaded in an attempt to starve the Palis into surrender by preventing supply of food and medications. And hey, where are these people today? Can we try them? What a shame! They are busy too. Berry is the speaker of the Lebanese parliament and Jumblat is a minister. Or maybe the wound has finally started to heal itself? Ah, good.

But no research of the Lebanese Palestinian love-hate relationship can be exhausted by studying only these episodes. These days the Lebanese don't take any chances with the Palis and keep them permanently locked in their camps, often surrounded by the Lebanese army who occasionally trade fire with militants shooting from inside the camps. But one shouldn't doubt that the Lebanese still harbor warm brotherly feelings towards their fellow Palestinian Arab brothers. Oh This mysterious and full of contradictions Arab soul !!!

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BBC never misses our Middle Eastern carnivals and on this occasion it has cluttered the whole of its Middle East page with Beit Hanun stuff. It mentioned in passing among other news though:

At least 30 people have died in renewed violence across Iraq following the lifting of a curfew imposed for the sentencing of Saddam Hussein.

The attacks included two car bombs set off in busy markets, which killed at least 10 people as they shopped.

The latest deaths follow a suicide bomb attack at a cafe in Baghdad on Tuesday, which killed at least 17.


When the IDF kills civilians due to malfunction in its fire guiding system, we should probably consider it as our soldiers missing the target. So it is heartening to know that at least when it comes to the Shiites and Sunnies in Iraq they still remember how to handle their weapons.

Admittedly there are things even worse in this world than Beit Hanun. For example it's estimated that in Sudan 300,000 Darfurians died since 2003 until now, while 1-2 millions were ethnic cleansed. This means that each day another 200-300 die. I was a sort of thinking to draw the attention of my dear friends to this fact but then if they could barely handle Beit Hanun, with that one they for sure will never recover. I just cannot do this to them. It would be too cruel.

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And on a totally different note, the love/pride parade in Jerusalem was postponed but our orthodox discovered that the words 'Homo' and "Beast' are the same in Jewish gematria. So they were parading mules and goats across the city all day long with some animals carrying posters - 'I am a proud beast !!!'.

With all the mess of the Middle East, at least we can be satisfied with one thing - we got great carnivals here.


One of my Lebanese friends sent me an email to inform me that PSP and Amal split shortly before the war of the camps, after they had spent a good time together crashing the Sunni militia - Al Murabitun. In fact he says that since then they engaged several times in fighting each other. On the bright side he informed me that some Christians supported Amal in the siege of the Palestinian camps. My sincere apologies go to all those peaceful Druz, Sunnies, Shiites and Christians who might have been offended by this factual inaccuracy.

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